Ben-WaBalls - Do I need them?


Do I need them?

1 Ever had to wear a panty liner because you were sick and every time you sneeze or cough, you feel a little urine escape?
2 Ever had to control yourself from laughing to hard because you were afraid that you would have urine leak?
3 Just had a baby?
4 Getting ready to have a baby?
5 Afraid of urinary incontinence when you grow old?
(which happens to about 75% of elderly women)

….If any of these apply, I always say to spend between $12.95 - $18.95 on a pair of Ben-Wa Balls now or hundreds of dollars on Depends later!

How do they work?

There are three ways to do Kegel exercises that include all the groups of muscles that one can use when performing these exercises:
1 Contract and Hold
2 Flutter
3 “The Elevator”

Before I spell out the three types, let’s be sure we are all talking about the same exercise.

Think of the muscles you would squeeze if you were urinating and wanted to stop the flow. These muscles form a type of “hammock” that runs from the front of the crotch area to the back. The muscles encircle the clitoris in the front, the anus in the back and the vagina in the middle. They are the same muscles that contract reflexively (on their own) during orgasm.

Strengthening these muscles by doing Kegel’s will enhance the sensations of orgasm and for some women make having orgasms more likely. When contracting these muscles, the buttocks muscles should move very little or not at all. You are trying to isolate and move the muscles that underlie the external genitals for women.

If you spend two minutes of doing these three types (which make a “set”) you do a set of 3 three times a day, you will very likely feel a difference in your ability to contract in about two weeks. It doesn’t take a lot of time, just a lot of remembering.

The Ben-Wa Balls can be used as “weights” by ambitious women who really want to work out their PC muscles. Think of it this way; you could tone your body by doing leg lifts or arm curls but you could get faster and better result by adding weights. Start by putting in one ball and doing these exercises. The ball will definitely add a level of challenge to Kegel’s. Later, when there is greater strength and tone add the second one.

These are great exercises to do in preparation for having a baby. A toned muscle will stretch more easily and will recover more easily after childbirth. As we age, these exercises are also helpful in maintaining tone to avoid urinary stress incontinence (leaking bladder). So given the benefits of enhanced orgasm and the health gains possible, doing Kegel exercises every day really deliver!

Sex Toys Are Win-Win: A Guide for Men


The old-fashioned vibrators were pretty scary: Ten inches long with lifelike veins and made of a squishy, horrible material that made them alarmingly penislike ‑- except much bigger and much longer and much wider and ohmigod, is that what women really want? The answer is no. Then why were they created that way? Because those sex toys were designed by men ‑- men who, sadly, didn't have any idea of what turns women on.

Fast-forward to the 21st century: Now, most successful vibrator lines are heavily influenced by women ‑- and the first thing you'll notice is that most aren't even penis shaped. They're designed to stimulate the clitoris, which is outside the vagina, rather than for penetration. Yes, the "Rabbit," made famous by Sex and the City, is a firm favorite, but many women just turn it around to use the clitoral stimulator instead of inserting it.

The reason? Well, brace yourself guys, but only 20 to 30 percent of women can orgasm purely through penetration (without clitoral stimulation). In other words, your thrusting in and out alone probably isn't going to make the earth move for her. That means one of you usually has to use your fingers to stimulate the clitoris during intercourse, which is harder than it sounds. It's awkward: Your hand gets cramped, and it's hard to maintain the gentle, consistent pressure the clitoris needs when your hand is being pushed by the thrusting motion.

The solution is a vibrator. One of you simply holds it against the clitoral area during intercourse and voila: an orgasm during penetration. This takes the pressure off men considerably; it doesn't matter if the erection is a bit wobbly (and, yes, all men experience this at some point for various reasons) because she's going to orgasm anyway. I need to quickly add here that almost all women enjoy intercourse without clitoral stimulation for its own sake ‑- she's not just pretending to like it. It's just that it's difficult for us to orgasm from that alone.

There's another very good reason why you should encourage your partner to own a vibrator and not see it as threatening or as a "replacement penis." Simply put, women who own vibrators tend to have more orgasms than women who don't. The more orgasms your partner has, the more her body wants. So she's more likely to want frequent sex if she owns a vibrator than if she doesn't.

Lots of vibrators these days are partner friendly as well. The idea isn't to chuck them into the bedside drawer but to use them together. She can use one to stimulate your perineum (the smooth, hairless bit between your scrotum and bottom) or your testicles. And lots of guys love it when a woman holds one against the side of her mouth while giving them oral sex. So there you have it: nothing to worry about and everything to gain!

Written by Tracey Cox

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